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  1. #1
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    Happys New Year!

    Happys New Year to all my friens at Jazcornes.
    And much much much love and blessins to all of you, even those of you that don't like me too much. For as two hands clap, if you clap your anger at me and I move outta the way, your anger will not hit my hand, but will instead rebound off the wall into nothingness and dissolve into the power of love.

    As such, I would like to tell you all bout ways to improve your life, and I henceforth call them Darryl's Nine Points of Love.

    1. Always let her know: it's always about her. Not abot you.
    2. Serve her delicious bagles with creams cheese made from scratch.
    3. Show her a funky good time! Dance until the midnight hours and then some, go to yoga for couples and practice deep brethins and whatnot. Ands bend into the shape of a pretzel. A good time will be had by all.
    4. Turns off the news, expecially them idiot fox heads and listen to the music for it soothes the savage beast! Even T rexes!
    5. Give her a toe rub. Spend an hour on each toe.
    6. Stay the hell outs of Wampsville. It's a bad town inhabited by bad people doins bad things. It's like Children of the Corn part 10.
    7. Look your loved on e in the eye and say "You means so much to me. Without you my life would be nothing. I would cease to exist. I am therefore your slave and will need to do as oredered." (You don't need to mean this, but sayins it is always nice gesture.)
    8. Gives roses, not carnations or some other ragass flower.
    9. Make the heart grown fonder, not by wanderins but by exploreins poetry by Rumi and Shekspare ands even TS Eliot! We all loves that words can makes us feel good, so why be nasty and mean when a frown is a smile tunr upside down?
    10. Stay cool. Stay calm. Speak from the hearts. For love is not love when the alteration finds an' whatnot, but love is true if when your chick alters, you still lvoe her even if she throws a pan at your face.

    I hopes that you incoroprate these suggestions into your resoluations. They work.

    Love,

    d

  2. #2
    The moldiest of all figs clinthopson's Avatar
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    MY MAN DARRYLS

    The man has gave us a models for hows to lives our lives in '09.
    Bright moments - right now!

  3. #3
    Registered User Mike Schwartz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by clinthopson View Post
    MY MAN DARRYLS

    The man has gave us a models for hows to lives our lives in '09.
    Not sure it was Darryls or Dr. Phils

  4. #4
    The Hour of Happy
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    "For as two hands clap, if you clap your anger at me and I move outta the way, your anger will not hit my hand, but will instead rebound off the wall into nothingness and dissolve into the power of love."

    Brilliant!

  5. #5
    I'm the face. Gentle Giant's Avatar
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    An hour on each toe? Who has that much time? I'd rather just give her a ragass flower.
    http://jasonmrubin.com

  6. #6
    The Hour of Happy
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    I kinda like carnations - not better than roses necessarily - but they smell fresh and peppery.

  7. #7
    The Hour of Happy
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    gg is right - an hour on each toe is too long.

    I usually only have time for a half hour on each toe.

  8. #8
    Registered User Mike Schwartz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentle Giant View Post
    An hour on each toe? Who has that much time? I'd rather just give her a ragass flower.
    Proof that talk is cheap; no way the *love machine* Darryls could ever comply with his own resolution.

    Wassup with this jive-ass resolutions BS, DarrylsWas the reals motiffs?

  9. #9
    ************ Monte Smith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tippy View Post
    "For as two hands clap, if you clap your anger at me and I move outta the way, your anger will not hit my hand, but will instead rebound off the wall into nothingness and dissolve into the power of love."

    Brilliant!
    Indeed. Many people don't understand the power of the clap, you know? A lot of people don't get the clap, but Darryls has obviously got it.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike Schwartz View Post
    Proof that talk is cheap; no way the *love machine* Darryls could ever comply with his own resolution.

    Wassup with this jive-ass resolutions BS, DarrylsWas the reals motiffs?

    Darryl only speaks the truthes. I loves my ladies so much, that one toe shall be treated as gold, the other like silver, the other paltinums and then the fourth like a diamond and the fifth like a sparrow who has fallen from a tree and needs tender, tender love.

    For alls we have is time, Jack! And if it takes ten hours to make my frend happy, so it shall be writen, so it shall be done.

    For as Rumi says, "The toe is the gateway to the soul an' whatnot."

  11. #11
    The Hour of Happy
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    Darryl,

    What is your hat size?

  12. #12
    We are the only reality patricia's Avatar
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    Few, besides Darryl know that the toe is the gateway to the soul.........and whatnot, and that he can keep his hat on.
    Last edited by patricia; January-5th-2009 at 02:58 PM.
    A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
    Oscar Wilde [1854-1900]

  13. #13
    The Hour of Happy
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    LOL, patricia.

  14. #14
    I'm the face. Gentle Giant's Avatar
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    How about placing a bagel with cream cheese around each toe? Then you can eat around it and end by licking off the cheese. Lox optional.
    http://jasonmrubin.com

  15. #15
    We are the only reality patricia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentle Giant View Post
    How about placing a bagel with cream cheese around each toe? Then you can eat around it and end by licking off the cheese. Lox optional.

    You're known as The Fabulous Casanova, aren't you??
    A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
    Oscar Wilde [1854-1900]

  16. #16
    The Hour of Happy
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    I wanna see that. Where do you get bagels for your toes?

  17. #17
    I'm the face. Gentle Giant's Avatar
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    http://jasonmrubin.com

  18. #18
    I'm the face. Gentle Giant's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by patricia View Post
    You're known as The Fabulous Casanova, aren't you??
    That's Casa Nova Lox.

    And yes, I like both feet and fish.

    http://jasonmrubin.com

  19. #19
    Each Day Is A Gift. Ron Thorne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentle Giant View Post
    And yes, I like both feet and fish.
    Ummmm ... I think that's more than we needed to know, GG.

  20. #20
    We are the only reality patricia's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentle Giant View Post
    That's Casa Nova Lox.



    My error and it was indeed a grievous one.
    A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.
    Oscar Wilde [1854-1900]

  21. #21
    The moldiest of all figs clinthopson's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentle Giant View Post
    That's Casa Nova Lox.

    And yes, I like both feet and fish.


    Hand smoked by Glen Gray.
    Bright moments - right now!

  22. #22
    The Hour of Happy
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    my goodness. who would have though a Darryl thread would head in this direction. my new year's resolution is to only buy what-nots by the dozen.

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