Alert Alert

[Lazz]

Subject: "Peeved'
Date: Thu, 13 Oct 2005 16:51:29 -0700

>The British are feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and
>have raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved'. Soon
>though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or
>even "A Bit Cross".
>
>Londoners have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when
>tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized
>from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British
>issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire
>of 1666.
>
>Be aware that the French government announced yesterday that it has
>raised its terror alert level from "RUN" to "HIDE". The only two
>higher levels in France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate".
>The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's
>white Flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military
>capability. It's not only the French that are on a heightened level
>of alert.
>
>Italy has increased the alert level from "shout loudly and
>excitedly" to "elaborate military posturing". Two more levels
>remain, "ineffective combat operations" and "change sides".
>
>The Germans also increased their alert state from "disdainful
>arrogance" to "dress in uniform and sing marching songs". They have
>two higher levels: "invade a neighbour" and "lose".
>
>Seeing this reaction in continental Europe, the Americans have gone
>from "isolationism" to "find another oil-rich nation in the middle
>east ripe for regime change". Their remaining higher alert states
>are "attack the world" and "beg the British for help".

[jeff54]

Good one, I actually did laugh out loud.

[Dr Dave]

I'm sorry, I really dislike jokes that traffic in lowbrow American perceptions of foreigners. But then again, why should I apologize? I'm a humorless asshole, as is well known.

[Lazz]

Yes yes, I agree.
Damn bad show.

[Monte Smith]

Originally Posted by Dr Dave

I'm sorry, I really dislike jokes that traffic in lowbrow American perceptions of foreigners. But then again, why should I apologize? I'm a humorless asshole, as is well known.

I don't think these are lowbrow American perceptions of foreigners. My evidence for this is that the Germans are herein said to have a security level called "invade a neighbour". That u in neighbour would be extraneous to an American wit and indicates to my satisfaction that this piece of comedy--which is funny until it comes to the Americans, yuk yuk--is a work that originated in the UK or somewhere else in the Anglosphere, but not the US.

Though about your last point we can agree, Dave.

[Lazz]

Well spotted, Monte.
A three-piece draylon lounge suite is being delivered to your door right now.

I have sympathy for Dr Dave's point of view, however, as I too am regularly saddened by the "American perceptions of foreigners" however high or low the brow of the perceivers. Nonetheless, the singular saving grace of the piece I posted for our shared entertainment is that it is mildly amusing.

[Monte Smith]

Originally Posted by Lazz

A three-piece draylon lounge suite is being delivered to your door right now.

Sweet!

[sonic1]

Originally Posted by Dr Dave

I'm sorry, I really dislike jokes that traffic in lowbrow American perceptions of foreigners. But then again, why should I apologize? I'm a humorless asshole, as is well known.

tsk tsk Doctor. I mean... Really.