On the Effectiveness of Aluminium Foil Helmets: An Empirical Study

[groover]

Abstract

Among a fringe community of paranoids, aluminum helmets serve as the protective measure of choice against invasive radio signals. We investigate the efficacy of three aluminum helmet designs on a sample group of four individuals. Using a $250,000 network analyser, we find that although on average all helmets attenuate invasive radio frequencies in either directions (either emanating from an outside source, or emanating from the cranium of the subject), certain frequencies are in fact greatly amplified. These amplified frequencies coincide with radio bands reserved for government use according to the Federal Communication Commission (FCC). Statistical evidence suggests the use of helmets may in fact enhance the government's invasive abilities. We speculate that the government may in fact have started the helmet craze for this reason.

http://people.csail.mit.edu/rahimi/helmet/

Seems intuitively obvious, but it's about time someone proved it!

[bluenoter]

I note that the spelling of aluminum is inconsistent; the British spelling, aluminium (with an extra i), is used in the headline and once in the body of the paper, but the American spelling is generally used in the paper. From that I conclude that the MIT students were, far from being simply heedless of detail, sending tinfoil hat wearers everywhere a secret message (the content of which eludes anyone else).

[John L]

Most important, they really look great!

[groover]

Fascinating deduction, bluenoter!

However, as I work for a company partly owned by Brits, I'm pretty sure that they would consider the American spelling to be deficient, along with our pronounciation. But WTFDTK?

[bluenoter]

Originally Posted by John L

Most important, they really look great!

The Centurion is the style for me! It allows me to accept and embrace the heretofore embarrassing pointiness of my head.

[clinthopson]

I rely on my aluminium helmet to maintain contact with the Mothership.

[John L]

Originally Posted by clinthopson

I rely on my aluminium helmet to maintain contact with the Mothership.

An aluminum diaper pin should suffice for that.

[patricia]

According to a temperary resident, of my acquaintance, now at leisure at a group home for the bewildered, all the aluminium foil helmut wearers are doomed and just don't know it.
He is of the 2 gallon ice-cream-bucket/trashbags on the legs school. According to Fred, the aluminium foil helmuts gradually emit cancer-causing ions into the brains of the wearers. Luckily, he realized that, before any permanent damage was done.
The bucket [he likes the chocolate-ripple container] has the added advantage of a metal carrying loop, which some choose to wear, jauntily under their chins.

[john williams]

Excellent Groover, made my day!

[GoodSpeak]

Originally Posted by bluenoter

I note that the spelling of aluminum is inconsistent; the British spelling, aluminium (with an extra i), is used in the headline and once in the body of the paper, but the American spelling is generally used in the paper.

The pronunciation is different, too:

Al-you-min-e-um.






Just thought I'd share....

[tippy]

hmmm

[Hudson Boy]

Some people's dental work has been known to pick-up broadcasts from radio, and other, bandwidths - which explained why they were hearing "voices".

[walto]

Some people's dental work has been known to pick-up broadcasts from radio, and other, bandwidths

Has been known by whom?

[Jazzzoline]

My brother in law gets strong electricity shocks with the screw they put in his elbow.

When I asked my dentist if i'd get shocks from the screw he put in my tooth, he looked at me puzzled. I wonder if my chances to be hit by a lightening are higher (wheres that thread "what do you wonder about"). My dentist couldn't tell.

[clinthopson]

This thread brought to you by the Reynolds Company.

[tippy]

I'm thinking if I wear one of these to work tomorrow I might be able to get some "time off."