You Have A Year To Live...

Dr Dave · June-22nd-2006, 07:15 PM

A thought experiment from the way long ago. You go see the doctor, the doctor tells you you've got a year left, and then lights out. What do you do?

I asked my lovely wife, and she said she'd visit friends, wherever they were.

Me, I just don't know. On the one hand, I'd travel the world, see the places I've always wanted to see: Shanghai, Benin, Crete, Perth, Des Moines. On the other hand, I'd get me a hotel room somewhere below 14th Street and go to the Vanguard every night until the money ran out. Or maybe I'd go to Las Vegas and engorge myself with professional sex services. Or maybe I just lack imaginination.

But I know you don't. You've got really good ideas...

GoodSpeak · June-22nd-2006, 07:23 PM

I'd get a second opinion

Mike Schwartz · June-22nd-2006, 07:37 PM

My Dad received just that message and shared it with me on June 1st, so we're in midst of living this.

He's the patriarch of our growing family [between today and December, he'll go from havng 6 Great Grandchildren to 11], and we will collectively and individually put his affairs together for this eventuality as per his wishes in relatively short order, and await and prepare for his predicted decline.

It's a weird situation to be in.....Today, the man feels pretty darn well. Not wanting to hold out for some sort of false hope, but at the same time, I reminded him about my son-in law's grandmother who was given a year to live by a doc [who is merely a man] 9 years ago.

I'm sure many of us have had or witnessed through others these 'death sentences' that work out both as predicted and otherwise.

Sergio Zamora · June-22nd-2006, 07:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dr Dave

A thought experiment from the way long ago. You go see the doctor, the doctor tells you you've got a year left, and then lights out. What do you do?

I asked my lovely wife, and she said she'd visit friends, wherever they were.

Me, I just don't know. On the one hand, I'd travel the world, see the places I've always wanted to see: Shanghai, Benin, Crete, Perth, Des Moines. On the other hand, I'd get me a hotel room somewhere below 14th Street and go to the Vanguard every night until the money ran out. Or maybe I'd go to Las Vegas and engorge myself with professional sex services. Or maybe I just lack imaginination.

But I know you don't. You've got really good ideas...

I'd tell him I can't pay the bill. Maybe he'll give me another six months.

John P. Cooper · June-23rd-2006, 01:32 AM

I don't know what I'd do. Be in shock for a while and get some therapy so I could 'enjoy' that final year.

I had a close friend who got a death sentence 5 years ago. She was not feeling well, which was unusual, so she went to the doctor, they ran tests and told her she had a month to live. Is that a shit deal or what when you are only in your late 50s.

She had a good sized estate that she felt compelled to put in order and that took up much of her final time. When they give you a month...and she was gone in a month, too....there isn't much to do if you feel there are obligations to put in order.

I worked with a guy who got the bad news that he had a year or so to live. I didn't know he had died, but a mutual friend told me that the guy simply went home and gave up. He didn't even last the year. Young guy, too.

Another friend was in remission for quite some time and then it came back really hard and he knew his days were numbered. At least he got some fun out of life in those last couple of years. He traveled, he ate, he listened to his jazz music, he saw his friends and family, etc. Then he simply got too ill and it was pretty much over.

I guess I just dont think about stuff like that.

Tom Storer · June-23rd-2006, 02:15 AM

A French magazine, "L'Intransigeant," asked the following question to various people including Marcel Proust back in the 20's:

"An American scientist announces that the world will end… If this prediction were confirmed, what do you think would be its effects on people between the time when they acquired the aforementioned certainty and the moment of cataclysm?"

To which Proust replied:

"I think that life would suddenly seem wonderful to us if we were threatened with death. Just think of how many projects, travels, love affairs, studies, it – our life – hides from us, made invisible by our laziness, and which certainty of a future delays incessantly. But let all this threaten to become impossible forever--how beautiful it would become again! …

[If] The cataclysm doesn’t happen--we don’t do any of it, because we find ourselves back in the heart of normal life, where negligence deadens desire. And yet we shouldn’t have needed the cataclysm to live life today. It should have been enough to think that we are humans, and that death may come this evening."

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 08:00 AM

The last phrase sums it up.

Truth is, we walk around every day with a death sentence. If that's what's required for people to do what they really want to do, get busy!

On the other hand, having experienced too many family and friend deaths in recent years, from cancer especially, I have to say that an honest doctor who can simply tell people that it's time to put their affairs in order and send them home is a rare find, indeed. I've watched too many of those close to me spend their last year being serially tortured by futile practices. Let people live while they still can, cowards, and tell them the straight-up truth. Everyone dies. There always comes a time when treatment is futile. Say so.

*****************

But to play the game with Dr Dave: I'd like to but can't say in public what my fantasy would be in that case. I'd not be thinking of fun so much as satisfaction.

Dr Dave · June-23rd-2006, 08:25 AM

Yes, life seems most precious when we know there's only a little of it left.

And not that I would dream of projecting my own fantasies onto Gary's, but it occurs to me that there might be worse ways to die than to do it while dispatching certain powerful persons who have made life miserable for others.

I'd also consider the meditation option: To attempt to shut off what Alan Watts used to call "chatter in the skull," to attempt to see what it's like simply to be sentient.

Now that's a fantasy.

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 09:01 AM

We're born with only a little bit of time left, Doc.

You should see a doc about your projection urges...

Pete C · June-23rd-2006, 09:15 AM

I'd work on getting my J.C. post count up to 40k.

moneyp · June-23rd-2006, 09:17 AM

That's a beautiful quote, Tom, the philosophy I try to live my life under to frequent rewards and occasional detriment. All in all, I believe Proust is right.

Gentle Giant · June-23rd-2006, 09:30 AM

I'd eat without fear of gaining weight, have rampant promiscuous sex without fear of getting infected, and see as much music as possible without fear of going broke.

Darryl · June-23rd-2006, 09:36 AM

I woulds find myself so many ladies with big butts. And the biggers the better, Jack! Ands I would make sweet love to them for many, many, many hours at a times.

Maybe all a the same times!

I might even throw Ann Coulters a bone.

patricia · June-23rd-2006, 10:34 AM

I've always thought that it was interesting that human beings all know that they are going to die, but they don't really believe they are going to die.

The biggest sin, I think, is procrastination. If you really want to do something that's important to you, do it. Today if you can. You are not ever guaranteed a tomorrow.

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 10:48 AM

You believe it after you've seen how quickly others go from living to not and realize right then just how special you are *not.* Gone, like a roadkill skunk, baby. Human one fraction of a second, carrion the next. No return.

True, though, that most people waste their life time acting as if it lasts forever.

Looking forward to "retirement" for example. First off, who says anyone's even going to live that long? No one's guaranteed a single minute, never mind decades.

Sleepwalking, baby. One life and one only. If you don't live it the way you want to while you're living it, you don't get another shot. That's the way it is. Unavoidably.

Doc Martin · June-23rd-2006, 10:54 AM

The question you should be asking yourself is: Is Death an end, a beginning, or just another stage on the path?

BTW Most people with one year to live are not able to eat vast amounts of food, and or have lots of sex.

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 11:03 AM

Clearly, it's an end.

Doc Martin · June-23rd-2006, 11:21 AM

"In that sleep of death what dreams may come?"

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 11:25 AM

None.

kedoane · June-23rd-2006, 11:42 AM

On my mom's recent cat scan, there was a tumor found. She went to a surgeon the other day and he said that it looks like a cancer of some kind. She will be seeing a cancer specialist next month. I'm not sure if this tumor is treatable, given her health (she has various health problems besides the Alzheimer's). We have gotten her estate in order a few years ago, when she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. For now it is wait and see for me.

patricia · June-23rd-2006, 12:00 PM

My late mother, who lived to be ninety-two, used to tell me that a way to perhaps prod yourself into doing, instead of sitting was this.
If tonight you put a rock on your doorstep, there are better odds that the rock will be there tomorrow than that you will be still alive to see it there.
She then said, "Do it now." Good advice then. Good advice now.

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 12:35 PM

Sorry to hear that about your mom, kedoane.

Noj · June-23rd-2006, 12:38 PM

Spend as many days doing this as physically possible.

Then go die at the beach, preferably in Hawaii.

Enforcer · June-23rd-2006, 01:04 PM

Mike and kedoane, my sympathies go out to you. I've had loved ones who I knew wouldn't be around for much longer and it's difficult to come to grips with. I've lost three family members in the past 2 months, and it definitely makes you re-evaluate your priorities.

As for myself, with one year to live? No worries about STDs, right?

steve(thelil) · June-23rd-2006, 01:07 PM

I'd finally do what I thought as a kid I would do once I became an adult (and, therefore nobody could stop me):

Buy as much ready to spread frosting as I could afford and eat it out of the tub. And if I had any money left over, buy all the baseball cards and Playboy magazines I could.

clinthopson · June-23rd-2006, 01:38 PM

Well, since I'm getting closer to that Great Beyond every day and if I had a finite timetable I think I would continue doing the things I enjoy doing now, but even more so.

Have fun with Donna.

Cook and eat what ever I want.

Smoke more cigars.

Keep doing service things that help kids.

Get back to Italy.

A month on the beach at Zihuatanejo.

Hit the Apple a few more times and hang out at jazz joints.

Hang out with my sons and the grandkids.

We've worked very hard for what we have now and the best thing I can do is to reap the benefits for as long as I can.

Gary Sisco · June-23rd-2006, 01:46 PM

And may it be a good long while to go, Clint.

patricia · June-23rd-2006, 01:55 PM

You know, this thread has got me thinking of how much wider our net stretches these days, now that we know each other, though we have never met, in many cases.
So, if I were to list the things I would do, if I knew the approximate time I would die, I would do some personal things and mend some personal fences.

The bequeathing part would be easy. I don't have anything that my girls will fight over.

I would then attempt to meet each and every one of you, if only to see if you are the way you are here.

Enforcer · June-23rd-2006, 02:01 PM

Fixed.

Quote:

Originally Posted by patricia

I'd invite Mone and Larry over for beers, guacomole and hockey on the TV. Then, I'd send Mone home and show Larry just how far up I pull those special socks....

moneyp · June-23rd-2006, 02:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by patricia

My late mother, who lived to be ninety-two, used to tell me that a way to perhaps prod yourself into doing, instead of sitting was this.
If tonight you put a rock on your doorstep, there are better odds that the rock will be there tomorrow than that you will be still alive to see it there.
She then said, "Do it now." Good advice then. Good advice now.

I've read this three times and I can't figure out what the advice is supposed to be. Instead of sitting, your mom wanted you to put a rock on the doorstep?