|
Crouch Apologized!
A friend of mine working at Jazz Times forwarded me the following draft
of the next Stanley Crouch article. Apparently, Crouch's harsh positions
have been dulled by the furor over his last column. Below you'll find
Crouch's latest musings on jazz. Remember, you heard it here first.
PBW
_____________
Black and White and Blues All Over
by Stanley Crouch
In the last issue of Jazz Times, I expressed my dismay at white jazz critics hoisting White musicians like Dave Douglas to the top of the jazz pantheon. At the time, I implied that these critics were only doing this as a reaction to their lack of musical talent and resentment of Black artists in general. Envy was the root of this evil, and money from billion dollar media conglomerates like Atavistic, Free Music Productions and Okka Disk.
I've had a change of heart since I wrote those words. I went back and listened to Douglas play on the Masada recordings. And his fusion recordings with trumpeter Cuong Vu. And his Tiny Bell trio recordings. Damn, that brother can play! Sure, it's Balkan music, but did you know "Balkan
Music" can be re-arranged to spell "Blak Musician"?
There was something more to Brother Dave than meets the eye. I consulted my avant-garde news clipping collection and it was obvious. In 1993, he participated in a trumpet mouth piece exchange program with Freddie Hubbard, Roy Hargrove and Waddada Leo Smith. Isn't it obvious? Douglas' saliva intermingled with the saliva of the best Black trumpeters of his generation, creating a new multi-ethnic super Trumpet God.
What to do? Should I tell the world about my latest discovery? How will the world deal with a new aesthetic messiah? I decided to consult the previousTrumpet God, Wynton Marsalis, a man who simultaneously invented the Internet and the bossa nova while a freshman at the Julliard School of Music. He would know what to do.
Wynton was taking a well deserved break from this latest project, a multimedia ballet where he composes the music and choreography, plays all the parts in the 19 piece trumpet orchestra and does the dancing. Damn, the brother even does the computer programming for the DVD-ROM release of the ballet. But I digress.
There was no point in delaying, Wynton already knew something was amiss. He emerged from his tanning booth, snapped at me and said: "There is a disturbance in the Force." Wynton wasn't wasting any time: "Brother Stanley, I know you have been susceptible to White music ever since you discovered you were half-Swedish. I will forgive your transgression this time. Dave has been trained well and it is understandable that you find his music enjoyable. Here are my instructions to you. Do not fail me, for if you do, your free tickets at the Lincoln Center shall be revoked.
"Go out and proclaim the virtues of Dave Douglas. Let the world know of his skill, virtuosity and swing. You may even praise him in your pathetic little Jazz Times column. Then tell the world that I, your one and only Trumpet God Wynton, do hereby challenge Dave Douglas to a cutting contest. On April 25, 2003 at 9 pm, I will meet Dave at the Lennox Lounge in Harlem and we shall do battle. And it shall be terrible. But promise your readers this: onlyone shall stand swinging at the end and it shall be me, Wynton, the Alpha and the Omega of the Trumpet. Amen. Praise be to me."
Indeed, all praise Wynton.
end text
Sure, it's an April fools message, but I like it.
|
Linear Mode
