The Parenting Thread

[walto]

There were a couple of these threads at the old site, and I (an older dad with two little girls(8 & 3, one adopted) found it helpful to occasionally ask for and receive advice from the more experienced (and let's face it, just better) parents around here. I'm pretty much always worried about something or other involving my little darlings, and I like having smart heads around off which I can bounce my neurotic anxieties.

Also, I have lots of facile advice (of the kind one can get pretty much anywhere) to give to those with (or about to have) infants/toddlers!

[moneyp]

Not a parent yet, but if you're gonna sit down to watch BAMBI with 'em, prepare them for The Scene. Trust me.

[Pete C]

Originally posted by mone peterson
if you're gonna sit down to watch BAMBI with 'em, prepare them for The Scene.

You might want to start with "The Deer Hunter."

Of course, I'm not a parent.

[Jimmy Cantiello]

I going to jump in here real quick with some down and dirty advice. I'm no parenting expert by any means but Joanne and I have four beautiful children who are mostly grown. Ages range from 26 years old down to 18 years old.

Don't micro-manage! Love them, protect them, but don't obsess over every little thing. Kids are incredibly resilient.............

[patricia]

Originally posted by mone peterson
Not a parent yet, but if you're gonna sit down to watch BAMBI with 'em, prepare them for The Scene. Trust me.

I remember The Scene" well. Good advice. Luckily, I learned about the possible reaction with Robin, so when Erin saw Bambi, I was prepared.
Also, there is an Animated feature film, I forget the title, about a baby dinasauer, which has a similar scene and it was MORE devastating than the Bambi one. Be warned.

As for advice, I don't know whether I feel qualified to offer advice in that I screwed up as often as I felt competent. The thing about parenting, I've found, is that because each child is a unique little person and no general advice, beyond loving them works for every child.

The one thing that I learned is that I cannot live through my children and that my job was to show them the way, as much as I knew, and to realize their potential. That alone was the part that taught me the most about observing and reacting. I found that by paying attention to what their dreams and asperations were, I could point them to experiences which would expand their knowledge of things which interested them. As a result, I was rewarded with two grown children who are interested in the world around them and their place in it.
At first it seemed as if my job was to set limits and worry. There were periods when I felt totally helpless to keep them from making huge mistakes, but they were their mistakes and they learned from them. Luckily, they looked to me for guidance and not for absolutes and I encouraged them to make choices, rather than thinking for them.
So, I guess my advice is to listen to them, knowing that the values you teach them, by example are the ones that stick.
My oldest daughter and her husband, just had their first baby [a little boy] and now I'll find out whether my mother was right. You teach your child to be the adult you are and to be the parent you were. Who knew??

[Sergio Zamora]

Originally posted by walto
...(8 & 3, one adopted)...

I would never have guessed.

[walto]

You're saying that cuz Chloe has those beautiful muscles, right?

[GoodSpeak]

The two toughest jobs I have ever had are teaching HS teenagers and being a parent.

My son is 13 and NObody told me that living with a teenager was tougher than teaching them. Teaching and PARENTING a teen are COMPLETELY different things.

My hat is off to those who have done this before me.

There can be NO doubt.




TimMc

[Dr Dave]

My best wishes and Godspeed to all parents. Better you than me.

Never saw Bambi, but Old Yellow tore me up.

[patricia]

Originally posted by jazzredcat
Never saw Bambi, but Old Yellow tore me up.

Ah yes, "Old Yeller". Me too. Any movie which involved shooting a dog, lame horse or any other animal, to put it out of it's misery reduced me to a teary puddle. Still does.

[Tom Storer]

Looking back on my 16 years as a parent, with my many triumphs and all the wisdom I have accrued, I have this unbeatable advice to give:

Don't have junk food in the house. They can't eat it if it's not there. They can eat it elsewhere, but at least they won't eat it at home.

That's about all I can think of. The rest of parenting has been, for me, pure trial and error. Lots of trial, lots of error, occasional decisions that, by sheer happenstance, work out OK. I consider myself lucky my son is still alive, in good health, doesn't hate me (well, not all the time, anyway), and is generally a good kid. One more piece of advice: count your blessings regularly.

[clinthopson]

Trial and error, lots of love including hugging, have a sense of humor, give them a chance to find themselves IOTW don't smother.

And when they're 21 take 'em to your favorite watering hole and get hammered with them.

[Jimmy Cantiello]

And then kick 'em outta the house............

[RBS]

Our little Samantha turns one year old in two weeks!
It's been an incredible experience, filled with a deeper love than I knew possible, and I've gone with less sleep for longer periods of time than I thought was humanly possible.

Joyous, frustrating and exhilarating. Everything previous parents said it is. Watching her start to stand up and move herself from one end of the couch to the other is amazing. Leaving for work in the morning and having her crawl to the door so I don't leave is unbelievable. My heart is full just writing this.

So tired, though.......

[Brian Olewnick]

Kids aren't so different from dogs, right? So, I'd say lots of petting and exercise and a trip to the groomer every three or four months.