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Old September-1st-2004, 11:21 PM   #1
Monte Smith
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Fruity sweet wrappers spark complaint

Ananova.com (UK)



A Catholic college has complained about new Haribo sweet wrappers which it claims portray fruit in sexual positions.

"We are shocked at the shameless presentation of sexual practices on the wrapping, which includes not only sexual intercourse but also fellatio and cunnilingus," wrote the St Blasien Jesuit College near Bonn.



The letter, complaining about the new packaging of Haribo's Moaom fruit chews, added: "It's irresponsible, to expose children to such pornographic representations."

The sweets wrapped in bright yellow, red and green colours show lemons, limes, strawberries, cherries and oranges playfully romping with each other.

But the college sees it differently. They were especially opposed to the lemon flavoured chews, which "undoubtedly show a green figure having sex with a lemon.

"The lemon, which from the drawing looks female, is obviously enjoying it with the greatest of pleasure."

Haribo bosses admit the new packaging is "very racy", but said in tests no complaints had been raised.

Spokesman Marco Alfter said: "The new wrapping is certainly fruitier than the old. But we have not had any other complaints. In fact until now the feedback has all been positive."
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Old September-2nd-2004, 03:58 AM   #2
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I'm not sure that lemon is female. Effeminate, perhaps.

Also, why does the Green Sex Machine have yellow-ish hands?
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Old September-2nd-2004, 08:30 AM   #3
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It's worse than you think! Obviously, all the fruits are gay!
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Old September-2nd-2004, 08:31 AM   #4
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This is like a page out of the Jerry Falwell playbook.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 08:47 AM   #5
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'bout time they introduced some decent sex education into schools.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 09:02 AM   #6
Slurpy
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Were there instructions to squeeze the lemon, until the juice runs down your
leg? Damn to hell that Led Zeppelin.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 09:23 AM   #7
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If the fruits were not enjoying the sex, that would be different, I take it.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 09:40 AM   #8
Enforcer
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Even I would not have assumed those fruit characters were having sex. And that's saying something.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 12:08 PM   #9
clinthopson
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Well, those wrappers sure gave me a woody.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 12:13 PM   #10
stonemonkts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slurpy
Were there instructions to squeeze the lemon, until the juice runs down your
leg? Damn to hell that Led Zeppelin.
That's funny. Just yesterday I heard Robert Johnson sing that lyric (I presume he was the first on record).
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Old September-2nd-2004, 04:44 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stonemonkts
That's funny. Just yesterday I heard Robert Johnson sing that lyric (I presume he was the first on record).
Not so! Robert Plant, it turns out, is much, much older than anyone suspected.
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Old September-2nd-2004, 04:49 PM   #12
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Hey look! It's Chairman Mao! "Mao Am," Get it?


Last edited by Dr Dave; September-2nd-2004 at 04:50 PM.
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Old September-3rd-2004, 04:06 AM   #13
mke
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr Dave
If the fruits were not enjoying the sex, that would be different, I take it.
Of course. It would have been much more catholically-correct.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Olewnick
Obviously, all the fruits are gay!
Shouldn't that be: "Obviously, all fruits are gay!"?
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Old September-3rd-2004, 02:46 PM   #14
Gary Sisco
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Buy 'em, collect 'em, fuck 'em.
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Old September-3rd-2004, 02:52 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stonemonkts
That's funny. Just yesterday I heard Robert Johnson sing that lyric (I presume he was the first on record).
I think Blind Lemon Jefferson gets that accolade.
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