things a man would never say

[frankenmeister7]

ok honey, i will take out the garbage.

ok honey, i will wipe your ass for the rest of my life, afterall you had my children

sure honey i adore u in that black dress.

honey, am i that fat in the suit

oh honey, i wasn't flirting with that blond,she was a knockout in the little black dress like yours

honey, get some rest and i will do all of the housework.

honey, i filled the gas tank up for you

baby, you know i love only you.

honey those dallas cowboy cheerleaders are just fake. besides every team has their cheering section.

ok honey i was wrong, i will admit my mistake.

honey, i am listening.

yes, i will put down the toilet seat.

honey is doesn't smell when i take a dump. you are getting a cold again. i smell good.

honey i will clean the garage this afternoon

honey there are six games on and we can watch all of them at the sports bar

honey if i'm lyin, i'm dyin

oh honey, i wasn't flirting with that blond,she was a knockout in the little black dress like yours

honey is doesn't smell when i take a dump. you are getting a cold again. i smell good.

honey there are six games on and we can watch all of them at the sports bar

[jesus marion joseph]

Originally Posted by frankenmeister7

ok honey, i will wipe your ass for the rest of my life, afterall you had my children

ROTFLMAO!!!

[Jazzzoline]

Originally Posted by jesus marion joseph

ROTFLMAO!!!

What's so funny JMJ ?

[Jazzzoline]

I did YOUR laundry
I did YOUR clean up
I washed your floors
I washed your windows...

It's worse than do nothing at all...

[jesus marion joseph]

Originally Posted by Jazzzoline

What's so funny JMJ ?

Nothing.










Ma'am.

[frankenmeister7]

if u guys make up a thread about women, well so can we.

if u can't stand the heat, get the hell out of the kitchen.

then of course, women do most of the work anyway.

IAROTFLMAOAM

WHICH MEANS I AM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING MY ASS OFF AT MEN,

for even coming up with such an infantile post.

ok, scott dolan lets hear the fallout. what is wrong this time.

Nothing.


But in my first post, what I was getting at is that the first quote of yours doesn't make sense, and the other two are definitely things that men would say.

Hence my confusion.

[frankenmeister7]

Originally Posted by Scott Dolan

Nothing.


But in my first post, what I was getting at is that the first quote of yours doesn't make sense, and the other two are definitely things that men would say.

Hence my confusion.

well, it appears then that men and women think and talk alike. so if i don't make sense at times, neither do u men.

i also get confused but never battered.

also a man would never admit to being confused so now i am confused at you. when have u ever let anybody get the upper hand or the best of u.

i am beginning to like the fact that u take time out to make fun of me. thats not being naive, but it sure seems very um,........................can find the word.

[Gentle Giant]

Gee, honey, I appear to be lost. I'll just pull over and ask that burly mechanic over there for directions.

[Ron Thorne]

Franki, you know that I'm your friend, so I honestly have to say that some of these suggestions are a bit over-generalized and "wacked", while others are on-the-money. And, some simply don't apply to me for various reasons.

Please understand that I'm not trying to create a persona of Mister Wonderful, but I'm not exactly as you've suggested, either. I don't think most men are, either.

For instance, in my situation:

ok honey, i will take out the garbage.
I take out the garbage most of the time. Otherwise, we do it jointly.

sure honey i adore u in that black dress.
Yep, I said something almost identical to that to Patti last week. And, I meant it!

honey, i filled the gas tank up for you
Not in those words, but I did exactly that today, which I do more times than my wife, for practical reasons.

baby, you know i love only you.
Again, not exactly, but Patti knows where my allegiance lies after nearly 40 years.

ok honey i was wrong, i will admit my mistake.
Perhaps not quite as often as she'd like, but more often than not.

yes, i will put down the toilet seat.
I already did.

[mke]

"I'm menstruating."

[Gary Sisco]

Get your lazy ass out and find a job.

[Gary Sisco]

But we never talk...

[Lenny D.Guitarist]

"I got a few hours to kill. Let's go to the mall."
"Your credit card limit is exceeded? No problem!!! Just call and have them increase your limit. Problem solved!"
"Can't wait to take you to my high school reunion, you old trophy wife you!"
"If that blonde flirts with me again, let's get out of here."
"Wow! Why didn't I think of that. Taping over "The Sopranos" to keep a record of old Doris Day movies!! Excellent move!"
"Who needs sex when I can gaze into your eyes and have so many fond memories?"
"You're absolutely right. I don't remember a stop sign being there either."
"I'm sorry I didn't hear you the first time. I was thinking about what to get you for .... oh hell, just for being you."
"Your mother's toilet overflowed? I'll be on it like Michael Jackson on a pre-teen Jamaican dishwasher."
"Of course I voted for Bush... just like you told me."
"I'm calling the cable company. HBO is getting too dirty for us!"
"Phone call for me???"
"Honey, your sister's on the phone. Let me talk to her first, please?"
"They're opening a "Hooters" bar?? I'll call all our friends; we'll shut that darn
place down pronto."
"You're absolutely right. That damn jazz really sucks. Do you have any old disco stuff?"
"Mark my words. Computer pornography will never take off."
"Another telemarketer? Next time let me answer it. I want to hear what all the excitement is about. Thanks."
"You want to get frisky?"

[Gary Sisco]

I'd rather be held anyway.

[Jimmy Cantiello]

"Do you think these slacks make my hips look too big?"...............

[Jimmy Cantiello]

"I think I'll pass on the porterhouse steak. I'll just have a small salad with the rasberry vinaigrette dressing"...........

[Lenny D.Guitarist]

"The hell with the Super Bowl. Let's rent "The Bridges of Madison County".

"Oprah gets smarter and more interesting every day."

"That Ellen DeGeneres show is the best thing on tv."

"Your sister wants to borrow my car for the weekend? Why didn't you say so?"

"Oscar Peterson is boring. Don't we have any Yanni?"

"Oh just a salad and a cup of broth for me. You should have the Fetucinni Alfredo."

"Damn it, I get so angry when Britney Spears wears those skimpy outfits."

"When the hell are they gonna let Alan Alda get his own talk show?"

"You got tickets for the opera for the same night as my World Series tickets?
Don't worry, I'll just give mine away to some homeless couple."

"I'll get your bubble bath ready pronto."

"I'll just have to vacuum the whole house again. I did a shitty job the first
two times today."

"Oh course I'll give your mother 10 grand for liposuction."

"There ain't enough time in the day to watch all those good reality shows."

"Of course I'm satisfied with our sex life. Anything more than twice a month is
ridiculous."

"I've give half my annual income just to have dinner with Larry King."

"You're right, Kenny G is so damn underrated."

[Deke]

Oh, put your clothes on, woman.

[Jimmy Cantiello]

"Those curtains are lovely. And that divan is to die for. You've done an incredible job with this room"...............

[Jimmy Cantiello]

"I'll have a margarita"..........

[Gary Sisco]

If I order a dessert would you split it with me?

[Dr Dave]

"Oh, you opened the '82 Chateau Margaux for your book club? That's marvelous! How was it?"

[sonic1]

Originally Posted by frankenmeister7

ok honey, i will take out the garbage.

ok honey, i will wipe your ass for the rest of my life, afterall you had my children

sure honey i adore u in that black dress.

honey, am i that fat in the suit

oh honey, i wasn't flirting with that blond,she was a knockout in the little black dress like yours

honey, get some rest and i will do all of the housework.

honey, i filled the gas tank up for you

baby, you know i love only you.

honey those dallas cowboy cheerleaders are just fake. besides every team has their cheering section.

ok honey i was wrong, i will admit my mistake.

honey, i am listening.

yes, i will put down the toilet seat.

honey is doesn't smell when i take a dump. you are getting a cold again. i smell good.

honey i will clean the garage this afternoon

honey there are six games on and we can watch all of them at the sports bar

honey if i'm lyin, i'm dyin

Are you having lady problems franks?

[sonic1]

Originally Posted by stonemonkts

Shit I've said that.

I think I figured it was the only way to get a dessert.

would rather skip dessert than skip dessert if you know what I mean,
stone

Stone, we are talking ladies, not male tail...

[Jimmy Cantiello]

Originally Posted by sonic1

Are you having lady problems franks?

Jared, for the record, Frankenmeister7 is a woman. She's the Yogi Berra of JC and we all love her. Sometimes she's a little obtuse but we love her just the same. As a matter of fact, that's one of the reasons why we love her..................

[frankenmeister7]

Originally Posted by Jimmy Cantiello

Jared, for the record, Frankenmeister7 is a woman. She's the Yogi Berra of JC and we all love her. Sometimes she's a little obtuse but we love her just the same. As a matter of fact, that's one of the reasons why we love her..................

obtuse!!


ok, i feel off tilt not full. thick as a brick. a house has to fall on my head. i knew that one day someone was going to hit me where it really hurts.

thats good though. jimmy c., u are right on the mark. thank u so much.


with that saying i would never tell anybody what i really think of you all. i have my favorites.

Sammy told me that i was ok and he is living proof that if a scientist can handle my bullshit anyone can.

welcome to my world.

She's the Yogi Berra of JC

THAT'S IT!!!!!

[Cem]

Originally Posted by Deke

Oh, put your clothes on, woman.

or...

"Already?"
"Can we cuddle a bit? How about we make spoons?"
"Can I spend the night?"