Desert Island Discs: How many would you give up for chickens?

[steve(thelil)]

OK. A twist on the usual. You are going to be exiled to a desert island. You have to find your own food and kill it and everything, unless it was dead already or a plant or both. And you can bring a solar powered record player and up to 10 records. But you could trade one or more of your 10 allotted records for 3 chickens (per record). So if you bring 9 records you can bring 3 chickens. If you bring 10 records , you can't bring any chickens. How many records and how many chickens would you bring?


Me: 2 records and 24 chickens. I'd bring Pet Sounds and Thelonious Monk Plays John Coltrane and 24 chickens.

Or else, I'd bring In a Silent Way, Rubber Soul and Louis Jordan's Greatest Hits and 21 chickens.

[steve(thelil)]

With Pet Sounds and Monk I'd bring 4 fried chickens, 2 oven roasted, one Shake and Bake Polynesian and one satayed.

With In a Silent Way and Rubber Soul and Louis Jordan I would bring 4 fried and 3 preserved in salts and spices from the West Indies.

[steve(thelil)]

top

And how will you be storing 24 chickens?


Refrigeration? Ice?

[walto]

They're LIVE chickens, no?

But are they nice plump chickens? I ask because several of my desert island discs are themselves edible. Not great, but nutritious. And I don't want to be trading them for any scrawny little shit chickens.

[Gentle Giant]

In the good old days, you would occasionally be able to buy a box of cereal with a 45 record on the back. You could bring a bunch of boxes to the island and play the records while munching on the cereal.

I'd be tempted to bring at least one Todd Rundgren album because they're so long, maybe Initiation. Songs in the Key of Life probably, Dave Mason's Alone Together, CSNY's Deja Vu, Gentle Giant's Free Hand, and a few capon.

[steve(thelil)]

No capon allowed in the hypothetical. Unless I don't know what a capon is and it's a chicken. Or unless it's a chicken with a cape on.

Thanks for your interest. This is important.

[clinthopson]

A capon in a soprano rooster.

As Mingus said, "Gimme dat chicken!"

[Dr Dave]

I wanna eat it, eat that chicken, eat that chicken pie
I'm gonna chew it, eat that chicken, eat that chicken pie

[steve(thelil)]

Originally Posted by Dr Dave

I wanna eat it, eat that chicken, eat that chicken pie
I'm gonna chew it, eat that chicken, eat that chicken pie

Lyrical, interesting and all, but clearly the writings of a man who can't decide whether he needs music more than chickens,

[hornplayer]

Originally Posted by steve(thelil)

Lyrical, interesting and all, but clearly the writings of a man who can't decide whether he needs music more than chickens,

Theoretically, you shouldn't need too many live chickens... assuming at least one is male...you'd then have a rooster. Wait half a minute and you'll soon have fresh eggs and pullets all over the place. All the chickens you can eat, and plenty to share.. in perpetuity.

So, I'd bring 4 chickens. one to eat right away, the rest to start a flock. (or brood, I think... )

[Pete C]

And, if thelil is there alone a pullet will come in handy.

[steve(thelil)]

Originally Posted by hornplayer

Theoretically, you shouldn't need too many live chickens... assuming at least one is male...you'd then have a rooster. Wait half a minute and you'll soon have fresh eggs and pullets all over the place. All the chickens you can eat, and plenty to share.. in perpetuity.

So, I'd bring 4 chickens. one to eat right away, the rest to start a flock. (or brood, I think... )

I'm tempted to say she wins. Although i MIGHT just bring some records that would likely reproduce. Say a Dizzy Gillespie and a Courtney Love.

[Monte Smith]

Screw the records, man. Do you have any idea what kind of a BAND you can put together with thirty chickens?! Of course, the hypothetical is going to have to make room for thirty tiny instruments (tiny saxes, tiny double bases, tiny drum kit, etc) and thirty little smart uniforms (unless this is some kind of far out Sun Ra space chicken band, in which case you need robes and funny slippers and turbans) and a pair of tiny tea-shades for the genius heroin addict in the group (there's always one). Fuck yeah. Great question, steve. But think outside the box! Blow that horn, bird! Salt peanuts, salt peanuts.

[steve(thelil)]

I would need fewer records if I had chickens who could play good music, but I'd need even more chickens, especially if I wanted to avoid having to eat my favorite musicians.

[patricia]

Ha Ha, I can bring all TEN records. Never has there been a more positive affirmation of my lifelong vegetarianism.
BUT, what happened to the fifty record/CD limit??
Was it reduced because of the cargo space required for all the chickens??
Also, what about those, like Bruce, who will be bringing their IPods?? Seems to me that he will be lurching onto the island with his full compliment of chickens AND around 4000 musical selections.
Now, is that fair??

[Gary Sisco]

I'd bring all of the chickens and make my own music.

Man's gotta eat.

[steve(thelil)]

I'm tired of music. I'd load up on chickens.

[Vince Kargatis]

Music sucks. Chickens rock!

[Jon Abbey]

can we bring an iPod inside a chicken?

[Lenny D.Guitarist]

Originally Posted by steve(thelil)

I'm tired of music. I'd load up on chickens.

Maybe you'd choke the chicken. Not me.

[Mike Schwartz]

Originally Posted by steve(thelil)

I'm tired of music. I'd load up on chickens.

3 chickens.....1 rooster......8 records. You want those eggs scrambled or over easy?

[Squaredancecalling Steve]

Ain't nobody here but us chickens.

[Gary Sisco]

I spent a year on a desert isle in the service (Iwo Jima). There was lots of stuff to eat there, already. Crabs were easily had on the beaches. Feral goats. Pheasants. Fish, of course.

So I'd bring the ten records and none of them would be "Pet Sounds."

[steve(thelil)]

I hear feral goats taste like feral chicken

[Surfer]

I 've killed and plucked a chicken with my bare hands while listening to Le Sacre Du Printemps. True story. Wasnt easy.

[larrycohen]

Originally Posted by patricia

Ha Ha, I can bring all TEN records. Never has there been a more positive affirmation of my lifelong vegetarianism.

Of course, what you bring depends on what kind of vegetarian you are. I'm a vegetarian, but I eat eggs and dairy, so I'd bring a few egg-laying chickens, and have regular supply of food.

And you can bring a solar powered record player and up to 10 records.

Records? Is everyone here old enough to have a "record" collection. Can we bring CDs? What about a 10 CD set - can I count that as one "record"? Or if not, can I make up a CD full of MP3s? That would hold at least a dozen albums. Hold on - I'll have my lawyer contact you.

[Chris D]

If a disc has chicken pickin' on it, does that get you some dispensation?

[Surfer]

The sun ain't yellow,
it's chicken.

[patricia]

Originally Posted by larrycohen

Of course, what you bring depends on what kind of vegetarian you are. I'm a vegetarian, but I eat eggs and dairy, so I'd bring a few egg-laying chickens, and have regular supply of food.

Some eggs and dairy in the winter only. Don't know why. Just always have.
Nothing with eyes.

Records? Is everyone here old enough to have a "record" collection. Can we bring CDs? What about a 10 CD set - can I count that as one "record"? Or if not, can I make up a CD full of MP3s? That would hold at least a dozen albums. Hold on - I'll have my lawyer contact you.

You bet there are people here attractively mature enough to have a "record" collection. I count myself among them.
As for your suggestion for substituting CDs for records, no objection to that, I wouldn't think. BUT, I draw the line at considering a 10CD set as one "record". That is, unless my 14 record, Bix Biederbeck boxed set and other similar boxed sets are to be considered one record each.
I'll have my lawyer contact your lawyer re your attempted skirting of the rules to weasle in with your MP3s to CDs of multiple selections. I trust that between the two of them they can hammer out a solution agreeable to all of us.